Penumbra
by grandlarseny
Summary: Life is no fairytale.
1. The legend

AN: Woowoo, my new baby! It's a lot different from my usual style, so I hope you'll try and like it despite the departure from the norm. Uhhhm…what to say. OH!

Warnings: VERY DARK AND MATURE THEMES. And I'm not talkin' sexin' kind of mature. If you are bothered by the mention of suicide, emotional trauma, the paranormal or violence, this is not the fic for you. Please do not risk upsetting yourself for a bit of amateur fiction. Thank you.

Okay, that being said. This is an AU, but an AU which has deep roots in the Inuyasha plotline. You'll see as you read. It's so 3am and I can't think of anything I need to say, sooooo…here's a tap dancing Jaken to get you through the rest of this whatnot!

Jaken:tippity tappity tap: Lalala, Lauren owns nothing:tippity tippitytippity: dadada, thanks to Andrea S. for beta, and Coley for suffering through Lars' craziness, she appreciates your help! Ba-DA-CHIIIIING!

There we go. Onward to the story! Thank you for reading, as always

**Penumbra**

**

* * *

**My father had been dead two months when I learned of the legend of Inuyasha the Hanyou. 

Son of a great Taiyoukai, he sought the Jewel of the Four Souls in order to transform his half-human body into that of a full demon. But somewhere along the way, Inuyasha's quest for power became side tracked as he found himself slowly falling in love. Even more shockingly, it was Kikyo, the miko who guarded the Jewel, who caused such unexpected feelings to arise. As their romance blossomed, both Kikyo and Inuyasha agreed they would use the Jewel to purge Inuyasha of his demon heritage, making him permanently human. Then, they would wed.

But, on the very day his change was to take place, Inuyasha was tricked. Shot at by Kikyo herself. Enraged, he stole the Jewel from the village. Before Kikyo could prevent him from doing so, he used the Jewel's power to cast away his human half, leaving his demon blood pure. But there was a price to pay for such a wish. Inuyasha became mindless, utterly consumed by bloodlust- for his soul was mortal. Kikyo sealed him to a sacred tree, before dying from deep shoulder wound.

Strangely enough, the wound seemed to have been caused by Inuyasha.

To this day, no one knows who deceived whom. Kikyo's body was burned. Centuries pass and Inuyasha remains pinned to the tree still, Kikyo's holy arrow forever freezing him in a state of stilled time.

It is said that Inuyasha's humanity still walks the world, seeking his imprisoned half, thirsting to be united once more. All while Kikyo's bitter spirit lingers in the walls of the shrine where she died, weeping her wordless apologies, hauntingly beautiful even in death.

It was a legend my father would have liked.

It was a story of betrayal.

I see him, swinging from that rope in his study. The screams of my brother echo in the empty halls, my mother's frantic voice winding around them as she calls the ambulance.

And me…I stare.

My name is Kagome Higurashi. I'm a fifteen-year-old junior high student. I live in an old shrine that's full of history- a shrine where true love once died. Where a broken family pieces their lives back together. Where a girl must reconcile her shattered reality to the fairytales from her father's lying lips.

A shrine full of history- a history that would soon alter my future.

* * *

"Souta! What are you doing?" My voice, I know, crackled with annoyance. If he dawdled anymore, we would be late for school. 

Huffing, I shoved open the door to the well house, probably with more force than necessary. The old slats of wood clacked loudly against the solid rock of the high walls next to the well house- part of a giant fence that encloses a little less than half of the shrine's courtyard. An entirely odd structure, no one knows exactly when it was erected or what it was enclosing- the keys to its' massive stone entrance were misplaced long before my Grandfather's time. Ignoring the possible damage to the door, I barged into the dark hut with all the fury of an older sister made tardy.

My little brother was crouched by the Bone Eaters' Well. Named that for yet another old story, it was ancient, less than sturdy, and dangerous.

"Souta! Get away from there! Grandpa told us it's not safe in here."

Souta bit his lip and turned towards me, making my exasperation double- he was making the face! It was a face only a ten year old wuss could master. Groaning, I massaged my temple as I caved into the pitiable look. "Alright, what is it?"

"Kagome." He was whispering, his eyes still wide with fear. "There's someone down there." He pointed shakily to the well.

I blinked in surprise. Dropping my backpack I rushed down the stairs and over to the edge of the wooden structure. "What? You mean someone fell in?"

Souta swallowed audibly. "No. Kagome…it's a ghost!"

Oh. My. God. "SOUTA! You twerp, you're making me late to school because you think you saw a ghost?"

He shook his head vehemently. "No Kagome! There really is one! I saw her!"

Exasperation was fast giving way to anger. "There are no such things as ghosts. I know you're always hearing stories about them from Grandpa and D…From Grandpa, but that doesn't make them real!" Honestly, I could understand this behavior a few years ago, but Souta was almost a middle school student. Grandpa's stories were entertaining, and inspiring- but they were still just stories.

Souta was unconvinced. His hands still trembled in spite of my stern reassurance. Time for big sister intervention.

"Okay, okay, fine, if I go down there and show you there's no ghost, will you please go get your backpack so we can leave?"

He nodded sharply, relief softening the fright that furrowed his brow.

Grumbling and slightly put out, and I started climbing down the creaking ladder, praying that this reckless action wouldn't result in a broken leg, or an even more painful injury. My steps echoed against the rock walls of the well as I descended into its' gaping mouth. I shivered slightly, not so much from cold as from dread of what evil creatures might be living at the bottom.

"Be careful, Kagome!" Souta sounded far away. A quick glance up revealed his pale face peering down at me.

"Yeah, I know! Get away from the edge!" I called back up to him. He obeyed me, for once.

The descent brought me deeper into the cold dark. I shivered as goosebumps rose on my bare legs. It was…creepy down here. Something prickled at the back of my mind, an uneasy feeling that seemed to be warning me- urging me to back pedal. It made me uneasy, and my senses immediately become more alert. Shaking the paranoia with some difficulty, I found myself at the bottom of the well unexpectedly. Casting blind eyes around, my hands grasped the rough wooden rungs of the ladder just a little tighter. Seconds ticked by in silence, the only sound my own measured breaths couples with the steady pounding of my heart in my ears. Relaxing, I felt a bit of my (unreasonable) anxiety subside. Nothing was stirring at the bottom of this old hole.

"Souta! I don't see any-!"

It hit me then- a force so powerful it cut my words off with my own gasp. The world spun as a hectic energy hummed around me- no, no, that wasn't right. It wasn't around me- it wasfrom me. Reality expanded in a rush of color, sounds, flowing time and blurring auras. My awareness was alive in ways that I never felt before- something was burning in me, something deep and primal- something that once was dormant, sleeping inside me. My limbs, my face, my mind- it was all consumed in this raw fire, ravaging me from the inside out. My hold on the ladder went slack without even a second thought, and I sunk to my hands and knees, the sudden onslaught of sensation overwhelming in its' intensity. And through it all, I could feel something foreign...something that wasn't me, passive but communicative.

I was pulsing.

And something was answering it.

A small cry broke through my haze, and suddenly, it was all over, as quickly as it had come. I was left feeling shaky, dizzy, and with the disturbing knowledge that I was no longer alone.

Eyes I didn't remember shutting blinked open. An ethereal light bathed the bottom of the well in bluish luminescence, and I was helpless to resist its' pull on my gaze. My heart…my heart thudded against my chest, each breath I took rasping down my throat almost violently.

A girl, no older than eighteen, gazed down at me impassively. Her shoulder was battered and torn- blood welled from the wound and coursed down her arm, and yet- it never touched the ground, never sullied or stained anything except her medieval miko robes and skin.

My stomach lurched as my own face looked back at me.

"Who are you?" My voice came out stronger than I thought it would, commanding in the hellish black I was drowning in.

Her eyes narrowed, like dark coals set in her wan face, fixing their unfathomable depths right on me. "You child. You should have stayed away from this place."

Her voice was deep, smooth, and cold- as freezing as the bottom of this well. Nothing like mine. For some reason, the knowledge that we weren't so similar gave me a brief burst of strength. "Answer me! Who are you?"

She ignored my question again. "Your awakening will have summoned him. He knows where to find you now." Her tone was emotionless. There have been winters less chilling. "It's time."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Hysteria had finally closed its' mind-spinning fingers on me. This was not happening- this was not happening!

She walked up to me- not floated, not glided, but walked, like a person still bound by such earthly laws as gravity. Halting a few inches away she studied me momentarily, with a strangely detached curiosity I have never seen anyone mortal display. I could see her wound clearly from my place on the hard packed ground- four slashes, right through her very bone. I winced as she crouched down, looking me squarely in the eyes.

"You're…you're Kikyo." I don't know how I managed these words. They were thick and wobbly against my teeth, but they came out. She neither confirmed nor denied my statement, merely kept those eyes, dead of everything human, trained on mine.

"You will put right what I have wronged." And she reached out, touching my shoulder lightly, a gesture seemingly executed without premeditation.

At the brush of her icy fingers an aching sorrow assailed my being, soul wrenching and all-encompassing. Tears automatically sprung to my eyes as my breathing hitched on a sob. God…it was more than I could bear. The edges of my vision went dark…I could feel myself slipping away from consciousness. She removed her fingers quickly, and all that pain was wrenched away again. Nausea curled in the pit of my stomach, my arms trembling once before giving out, leaving me to fall in a heap on the ground. I fought the urge to retch, jerking my eyes up to where she should have been leaning over me- but she was gone.

I don't know how long I lay on the ground, trying to keep my vision from swimming and my meal down. Rising uncertainly on shaky knees, I fumbled for the ladder. Climbing had never been more difficult- everything felt surreal, dream-like. Grabbing onto the lip of the well, I managed to haul myself over the edge and land hard next to Souta in a heap of limbs and twisted fabric.

He was crying, and suddenly, a bone-deep weariness stole whatever had been sustaining me.

"Are you okay, Kagome?" He sobbed and I nodded tiredly, trying not to show him how shaken I was. "You saw her too!" his voice died down. "You saw her."

There was a muffled silence in the cool shadows of the well house, light breaking through the cracks in the wood to throw patterns against the weeping boy. He had been right. I should have listened to him…I should have…

"…I'm sorry, Souta."

He wailed, and I closed my eyes against the familiar sound.

* * *

I didn't think about my close encounter with the dead priestess in the days that followed. I forcibly removed from my mind the fact that we looked nearly identical. That day, when I rose from the well house's dirt floor, I vowed to put it behind me. I was hallucinating, I reasoned, some sort of delayed effect of my father's abrupt passing. I didn't try to explain how Souta also managed to see this 'vision'. Fairytales were not true. They just weren't. 

Then I started to notice the presence.

A little at first, and then more intensely as time went on, I felt watched, stalked. The world began to change. Everyone seemed to hum with some mysterious force, and yet, at the same time they were completely normal. Things I never stopped to consider suddenly pulled me with an almost tangible magnetism. The cemetery on my way to school. The old park where it was rumored demons still skulked. The giant stone wall closing off half of our shrine.

But always, even with these startling new revelations, I felt those eyes. I began to carry a small can of pepper spray in my purse, and jumped at shadows that seemed too close to my own late at night. Despite that, I had almost convinced myself that nothing in me had changed, that life was as normal and humdrum as it always was. My mind slipped easily back to old faithfuls- grades, friends, family.

Then, as the reality of the situation started to fade to fantasy and dull history, she began her weeping.

It was the first night of what later became her nightly haunting. I shot up in my bed, my heart hammering away in my chest. I had been dreaming, but of what, I could not remember. For no particular reason, I held my breath.

That's when I heard it.

A quiet moaning, drifting through the walls of our house. I gasped in fear, choking on the air as it hit my lungs. The terror pushed everything out of me but motion. I ripped off the bed covers before thought filtered through my shocked haze, my legs pumping as I raced towards the sound. Why did I answer it? Why couldn't I seem to deny that calling?

I stumbled into the courtyard, the stone rough and cold against my bare feet. My chest heaved, my eyes strained. Where was she?

Where was Kikyo?

And then I saw her, bloodied, kneeling, glorious, not more than two yards away. She clutched at her temple and threw her head back, the wail that escaped her throat a tormented plea for release. Her sorrow made my bones ache, my muscles tremble.

She turned and caught my stare, her charcoal pupils boring into me. There was an instant understanding. Something passed between us, a deep empathy I knew was not inspired solely by her tragic plight. There was more there, binding us together.

"Find him." She mouthed, her crimson streaked hand stretching towards me.

"You're not real!" My voice broke with my tears, and my breathing became shallow and harsh.

She clenched her teeth in a grimace, squeezing her eyes shut. I thought I saw tears slip down those flawless alabaster cheeks. And then I felt it in me, some last reserve of self control and safe ignorance strain and break. I finally understood why I denied Kikyo's existence so vehemently and completely. It was because I already believed she was real. My hyperventilating breaths deepened rapidly to harsh sobs, and when I looked up she was gone. But it was still there, that realization, and I fell to the ground and cried as bitterly as she had. There was no time, no air. Only me, and that awful truth.

"Kagome!" Grandpa shouted as he ran to me. I barely heard him. Vaguely, the pressure of his hands eased my head up from between my knees. "My god. What's wrong! What's happened Kagome? Are you hurt!" He looked terrified.

"She was me, she was me, she was me, she was me…" It felt as if those words were soft, but I could hear the shouts of my voice bouncing back from the stone wall. I knew then, that I had been screaming it. Even as he folded me in the comfort of his arms, even as my voice died down to a bare whisper, I couldn't stop saying those awful words. My eyes leaked tears on his shoulder as I buried my face in it. My hands hardly dared to let go of his faded dressing gown, lest the world spin away even faster.

When I finally lifted my eyes, my vision had gone fuzzy, but I swore I saw a figure retreating into the shadows of the shrine. And with it, the sensation of being watched echoed stronger in me.

What was happening to me?

* * *


	2. Reality

Authors notes: Hellooooo. Chapter 2. Woowoo! I had a reviewer ask me if I actually knew what Penumbra meant, and brought up the point that it was a term for a part of a sunspot. You are correct, but the first definition of Penumbra, according to Webster's, is this:

**pe·num·bra** _n._ _pl._ **pe·num·brae **(-br) or **pe·num·bras:**

A partial shadow, as in an eclipse, between regions of complete shadow and complete illumination.

SO. Think Kagome's life. Think recent past events. Think the genre of the story. Think symbolism.

Also- For those that don't know- Kagome's name is an unusual one. It was actually derived from an old children's rhyme whose origins are vague. It is still unknown as to what 'Kagome' actually means. Anywho, the rhyme you will see in the beginning of this chapter is the childhood rhyme that Kagome got her name from. The translation and explanation was found at Inuyasha Sengoku o-Togi Zoushi if you wanna check it out for yourself.

That being said, I'll leave you to the fic Shpanks for reading!

**Penumbra**

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* * *

****_Kagome, kagome,_**

_His deep baritone was still so familiar._

"_And so Rose Red and Rose White went into the woods, where they discovered. . ."_

_**When does the bird inside the cage come out?**_

"_But as she gazed at his face, she accidentally spilled tallow on his linen nightclothes…"_

_**At dawns and evenings.**_

"_Food would never pass his lips, water would never touch his tongue, for it would all turn to brilliant gold. Still he did not resent it, until finally, one day, his daughter fell to the curse of the touch as well…"_

**_Who is in front of the back…_**

"_Even in eternal sleep, she was beautiful, and the prince bent down to place upon her rosy lips, a single kiss…"_

**_..where a crane and a turtle slipped and fell?_**

"_And they lived happily ever after…"_

_Happily ever after…_

**_Kagome, Kagome…_**

**_

* * *

_**"Kagome. Kagooooomeee? Hellooooo, earth to Higurashi!" 

I blinked, startled out of my mental doze. "I'm sorry, what were you saying?"

"I was just asking you, when are you going to give Hojo a break, and start dating the poor boy?" Yuka grinned at me, a hint of mischief sparkling in her eyes.

"Yeah!" Eri piped in readily, "Because if you don't want him, I'll gladly step in to ease his pain."

The group of girls roared back into conversation, while I easily hung back, forgotten in the din of teenage bantering. My stomach felt heavy, sugary sick with too much milkshake.

Once upon a time, when I had been a normal girl with one annoying little brother, two happily married parents, and a crazy old grandpa, these girls had looked at me as one of them; one to tease, one to laugh with so hard we couldn't keep our balance; one to whisper secrets to in the sleeping bags, rooftops, and fast food booths of our world. Now I was a normal girl with a tragic back story, one hesitant and terrified little brother, one struggling parent, and a grandpa who pulled me back from the edge when he found me, screaming, outside at 3 am. These girls now looked at me as if I was something fragile, an uncomfortable outsider in their otherwise carefree lives. Even tonight there was a vulnerability in the gazes they were shooting me that I still could not stop resenting. I was not a friend anymore, I knew. I was an obligation.

"I'm gonna go." I stood quietly, and the girls flinched, the way they did at horror movies. A grim smile touched my lips at the thought of me being that first unexpected casualty.

"Okay Kagome. We'll see you in school tomorrow." Eri offered hesitantly, and I nodded, flashing a grin that I knew was stretched too thin to be believable. The door of Wacdonald's jingled merrily as I exited.

In the streets, the light of dusk cast a supernatural glow on the people still bustling about. The humming of their collective energies had become commonplace to me, no longer so alien and frightening. Why I was noticing this phenomenon was still an unanswered question, and I chose not to ask it too often. Sighing, I turned, and began the long trek home. I knew what I wasn't admitting to myself.

I haven't been the same since I climbed down that well.

In fact, nothing has. Not Souta, not the shrine, not anything.

There was this expectation, this excitement that told me the worst was yet to come. And sitting here waiting was driving me crazy. Just thinking about it triggered memories of my nights filled with Kikyo's mourning. I could still feel the cold ground on my knees if I thought hard enough about that first haunting. I pushed it all aside, keeping my eyes and thoughts on the pavement.

It might have been for that reason that when footsteps started echoing mine, I noticed. Fear welled in my throat as I felt those eyes on me, that presence at my back. I stopped, to see if the footsteps would still come, but they didn't. Swallowing back my terror, I started walking again. The soft thud of shoes followed the clunking of my low heels. I sped up. The footsteps matched my pace. Then went faster. He wanted to catch up. I turned around without even thinking, my skirts whirling around my thighs, hair whipping across my cheek. The figure stopped, obviously surprised by my actions. Our eyes met briefly, his shadowed by the hood of a torn and dirtied sweatshirt, but despite the darkness, something was exchanged. He saw my fear, knew I was frozen with it, and I could see it excited him- tempted him. Motion seemed to slow as he smirked and it was unmistakable that now we both knew- the chase was on.

I dropped my school sack and flew, my legs kicking up gravel, my arms grasping desperately at empty air. The sidewalk blurred under me as breathing became torturous, each gasp burning down my lungs. Lights flew by, familiar landmarks- the cemetery, the woods, and finally, the steps to my shrine. I chanced a look behind me, and shrieked when he was closer than anticipated. I don't know how I got up the steps- animal instinct pushed me past a point where I could think about what I was doing. Suddenly his weight collapsed on me from behind, his hot, rank breath fanning my neck. I screamed, my frame so weakened from terror my knees nearly gave out. Preservation made me ram my elbow into his stomach and he coughed and released me. I ran to the door, frantically trying to open it, but it was locked. Later I would remember that Souta, Mama, and Grandpa were at his Back To School night. But now, it just made me more desperate. I turned back to my attacker and froze- he wasn't anywhere to be seen. I could still feel him though, the whisper of his menace through the leaves of the trees. My breathing was still hitched, jerky, as I swiped at the tear tracks on my face. I needed to find safety, before he decided to show himself again. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye- Kikyo. She glowed in a way that seemed new to me, though I knew it wasn't.

"Follow." She mouthed, and turned the corner. The swish of her robes led me past the house, the well house, and to the stone gate that hadn't been opened since my ancestor's generation. She turned and looked at me before passing through the wall. She'd led me to a dead end. My throat closed up.

"Kikyo!" My voice was raw against my throat as I banged my fists against the gate. My fingers tangled in the webs of ivy, and I grew maddened with my movements, tearing off chunks of vine. It was useless, and after a few moments of violent clawing, I ceased, barely swallowing the tears that threatened to come. "Don't just leave me here." I whispered hoarsely, slumping against the gate in defeat. I heard a thick 'clack' from the other side before the stone gate slowly swung open under my weight.

I knew I must have stared for longer than I thought because I could hear Kikyo's voice urging me, "Now! Now!"

I rushed inside the courtyard, but my eyes were behind me the whole time. Which is why I didn't see him at first.

The roots of the tree had taken a bizarre path of growth. Instead of sinking into the ground, they were curled around his body, centuries of neglect letting them go wild. His outfit was dirtied, frayed, and in the old style of dress. By all means, if it was as aged as it should have been, it would've disintegrated off his body by now. And yet, there it was. His hair was silvered white, longer than my own, and his fingertips ended in claws made for ripping flesh. And lodged in his heart, an ancient miko arrow.

Inuyasha.

I must have stepped forward, must have been so entranced I didn't notice how close I was getting, because when my attacker came from behind, he slammed me against the sleeping boy on the tree.

"You knew this would happen to me, Kikyo! YOU KNEW!" His hands were strong, too strong, when they wrapped around my throat.

"I…I…" My vision was going black. Choking. A memory. Feet dangling in midair. That rope. Dad.

"You'll pay for what I've suffered through, you little bitch!" He snarled, shaking me violently.

"Not…her…" Sirens. Whispers. Ashes. Dad.

A beautiful, impassive face, inches from my own. My fingers reached, touched the shaft of wood that sealed him there.

"Inuyasha…"

And then I ripped the arrow out of his chest, going dizzy as it disintegrated in my hands. From behind me, those punishing hands went slack and I fell to the ground, gasping and coughing.

Inuyasha began to pulse with an eerie, sinister force. Waves of it poured off of him, visible to the naked eye. I could hear his joints start to crack, rusty laughter bubble in his throat, and suddenly there was a sharp movement, faster than my thoughts could track. Pieces of thick tree root rained down around me, but my gaze was locked with his as he floated to the ground, awed with his power. His eyes were inhuman, scarlet and cornflower, thirsting for carnage. The bottom dropped out of my stomach as his claws descended on me.

Suddenly, a body collided with Inuyasha's, and both were thrown to the ground. I struggled to my feet when I realized it had been my attacker that had intercepted the killing blow. The filthy hood had been knocked off, revealing his features for the first time. He had the same face as the boy I had awakened but it echoed completely the one element the other had lacked- humanity.

The two were circling each other, snarling and snapping. They leapt and those claws drew blood, while those hands broke bones. They parted, gasping in pain, before meeting again in violent confrontation. Two identical men, different coloring, same bloodlust.

"Join with me!" Inuyasha's humanity shouted, fending off another lethal attack.

His demon side cackled, a sickening smirk revealing his elongated incisors. "A weak little human like you? Killing you will hardly bring me pleasure."

"This is madness…" My eyes were wide, horrified, watching them cut away at each other, bit by bit. My hands pressed against my ears, trying to block out the wet thuds as they struck each other. "Madness…" But I couldn't look away.

The demon pinned the human to the ground, grinning as the other coughed up blood. He extended one hand into the air, poised for a killing blow. "And now I'll tear out your precious human heart."

"STOP!"

The two figures froze as the courtyard blazed with pink light. Suddenly, one Inuyasha began sinking into the other, their points of contact sucking the other in. Primal screams were ripped from their throats, mine joining them as that overwhelming feeling of all-consuming awareness stretched my brain again, testing my limits. It was too much, that power, and unable to think of any other way to stop it, I rammed my knuckles into the stone ground. The pain was the shock my system needed, and I collapsed, cradling my bloodied and aching hand against me.

I was abruptly heaved up by the collar of my shirt, still whimpering with pain.

Inuyasha was glaring at me, but his eyes were not the dark thirsty ones of the form before. Now they were light, amber colored orbs. His irises stood out, pupils dilated almost like a cat's.

"Hand over the jewel, Kikyo."

"I'm...not Kikyo." I groaned. "Please…I'm Kagome."

He snorted. "What the hell are you talking about, wench?"

I managed to point a shaking hand towards the gate and my house. "It's been…five hundred years. Kikyo is dead. My name is…"

But I never finished, because Inuyasha dropped me abruptly to the ground. "YOU LIE!" He snarled, before he grabbed a fistful of my hair. "I don't know what kind of devil you are, but I do know you have the Jewel. WHERE IS IT?"

"I don't have it!" I yelled, hoping force would help convince him.

"Don't you fucking say that! Its energy is crackling all around you! It's…" He broke off suddenly, his eyes lowering to my shirt front, their stare wide and disbelieving.

"What is it?" I shrieked, suddenly frightened by that look.

His eyes met mine again, still denying what he knew. "How the hell did you manage that? How did you take Kikyo's face? How did you lodge that jewel in your heart?"

"What?" I gasped, hardly daring to breathe.

And then his attention was directed elsewhere, and he dropped me again. I watched his lips as he mouthed a now familiar name.

"Kikyo."

And there she was, watching us, looking at him with such a pained longing. Her words came back to me.

"_You will put right what I have wronged."_

All went dark.

* * *


	3. Knowledge

AN: My apologies. It's so, so short, and far too long in coming. But, I can at least report the rest should be flowing more smoothly than this one did. Uhmmmmm...lessee. LOVE my beta, (if you don't know who it is yet, shame on you!) LOVE my qualified reader, (once again, for shame if you don't know) and once again, LOVE YOU for reading 3 Enjoy!

**Penumbra**

**

* * *

**It was war. Flames toyed with my robes, left sooty love bites on fragile skin. Fighting instinct drew my mind as sharp as the arrow already drawn and waiting for purpose. There was so much heat, cooking the smells of filth and vomit and human struggle. I didn't gag, didn't even hesitate as I became dragon slayer, warrior, hunter. The sweat plastered cloth and hair to me, the blood bathed me in its' sanctioned sin. 

And then…

Frozen.

This wasn't me!

I ripped out the ribbon binding my hair.

"Damn you, Kikyo! Stop it!"

No voice answered mine. The roar of the battle mingled with the blood pounding in my ears. It grew softer, fainter, and I suddenly realized I was no longer in the burning village. Where I was now was dark and cool and boundless. The skin of my face grew dry, growing taught on my features. It wrinkled, tore, pieces of flesh falling to the ground in sizeable chunks. I could see it all happen, spectator and participant at the same time. The last of the skin slide off my chin and hit the ground with a wet 'splosh.'

But the face that emerged…was Kikyo's.

My hands rested lightly over my cheeks. I heard my own voice speak, echoing almost separately from my awareness.

"I don't understand."

In the next instant I was yanked back to where I had been previously standing, watching lives and dreams going to hell, burning on a funeral pyre fit for Vikings. Then a wrenching force, an ungodly pain, and a sword was through my chest.

My body crumpled to the ground on my scream.

* * *

"NO!" 

It was gone. Heavy hands grasped at my pounding heart, searching for the fatal wound. My fingers found only breast and collarbone. I was alive.

"You're awake."

I jerked towards the voice, noticing for the first time that a child stood near me. My school bag was clutched to her midriff.

"You dropped this."

"Who are you?" I moaned, letting my aching head rest in my hands.

She flashed me an enigmatic smile. "My name is Maro, but I was once known by a name very different, while I lived in the Warring States Era; a time when Kikyo, my older sister, was still very much alive. It is my former self who comes to you now."

At the mention of Kikyo it all came rushing back to me. I sucked in a gasp.

"Where's Inuyasha? We have to get out of here. He's going to kill us!" I rose shakily to my feet, ears straining for any sound of a coming attack.

"Inuyasha?" The young girl asked, blinking up at me. "He wasn't here when I found you."

"Please, come with me inside. Just inside. So if he comes back we're not out in the open." I knew my voice held a hysterical note, and the girl gazed back at me with age-ridden eyes. It freaked me out, seeing the eyes of a grandma set in a child. But really, what hadn't I seen lately that wasn't worthy of a freak out?

"Alright." She agreed finally. "Explanations are more conducive with tea anyway."

It was such a trite reason, but I took what I could get. Forget that that monster would rip apart her tiny female frame, sparing no concern over the fact that she would've died just as effectively if she was left to walk home on her own, or maybe cook dinner on the stove. It must be terrifying to be that young- knowing you couldn't even defend yourself against another child if they happen to grow faster. Depending utterly on the love of your parents to keep you alive. And what if your parents didn't love you? What then? I hobbled to the door, her small arms supporting what she could of my exhausted frame. With her help, I fished the house key from my bag.

When I slid the key into the lock my hand trembled so viciously I almost couldn't find the metal slit in the bolt.

She noticed, I know she did, because she was staring at my fingers, shaking like there were motors under my skin.

But she never said a word.

* * *

In the house, the warm smells of cooked food and air fresheners slowed my beating heart, but I still felt numb and hypersensitive at the same time. I did as the girl suggested, and put on the kettle, setting out two blue-painted tea cups. They weren't 'my teacups', I noticed, they were 'Grandpa's teacups'. I knew it had only been three months, but I was beginning to wonder...would this shrine ever feel like home? 

'_Don't start with this again, Kagome...'_

It seemed like mere seconds had passed when the kettle whistled, split seconds to set out the tea cups, steep the tea. Maro poured, while I clenched my fists against my thighs, delicate tremors disturbing my flesh from head to toe. My mind was blank- my heart...all blank.

"You're in shock." Maro observed, taking a delicate sip from her cup.

The weak laugh that tumbled from my stiff mouth held anything but humor. "Wouldn't you be?"

A twist of her lips, hideous and cynical on that young mouth. "You'll see worse."

Correction.

_I'm just worried about her, Dad. Even though she's had time, Kagome has never really mourned for her father. I'm beginning to think she's been...damaged, by what she witnessed. _

Have seen worse.

But I nod, assenting to her authority on the subject. "You were her sister?" I asked, the still air begging for a change of subject.

"In another time, yes." Another sip, another calculating gaze.

"How do you know that?" My voice is dull, and I can't find it in me to conjure curiosity such a question would require.

"My current awareness has been bonded with my former one, in order to aide you in your quest." Neat tiny fingers, folded like an adult's. Indifferent, schooled expression, tranquil like an adult. Where was the child Maro must have been?

"My quest?"

"You...don't know the story about Inuyasha, do you?" The edge of concern made me nervous.

"I know it." I defended. "Inuyasha fell in love with Kikyo, priestess of the Jewel of the Four Souls. But one of them was betrayed- no one knows who did it first. Inuyasha used the Jewel to transform into a full demon, but he only succeeded in splitting himself right down the middle. Kikyo sealed him to the tree, then she died."

Maro moved to my side of the table. "Then tell me, Kagome, how you came to have this jewel in your heart if Inuyasha had successfully used it to fulfill his wish."

I was blindsided by the hole in the story. That's right. If the Jewel of the Four Souls ceased to exist- how did it end up in me?

"I...I supposed I assumed that Inuyasha's wish wasn't fulfilled- since he became mindless. And so the jewel remained." It was staggering really. This changed everything about the legend. "Why wasn't the jewel destroyed?" I realized I had been clutching at my chest, the steady beat of my heart a bit more potent than usual. I knew now, beneath the layers of my skin, that stupid hunk of rock was messing with me.

"The jewel Inuyasha used was a fake." Maro's replies were frustratingly short and to the point.

"But why would there even be a fake jewel? And is it because of the jewel that I'm having these crazy things happen to me?" I was hungry for knowledge now, desperate to understand the situation more.

"No one knows why or how Inuyasha came to possess a fake. It's a mystery that was never solved. Kikyo sealed him to the tree, not because he stole the jewel, but because he attacked her, and because she knew he was no longer a sane being. I think...I think she regretted loving him. She must have known it was doomed from the beginning."

My vision must have been affected by the day's events, because for a moment I did not see an eight-year-old girl, but an old woman, skin wrinkling with melancholy under an iron eye patch.

"Kaede?" I whispered.

It was gone, and it was Maro's face I saw look at me, startled. "What did you say?"

"I..." I felt a splitting headache come on, and that expansive feeling was returning. My mind stretched uncomfortably. "I don't remember. What is this? What is happening to me?"

"Those are your powers. Your meeting with Kikyo must have prematurely woke them. Which would also explain how Inuyasha found you."

"What powers? And what quest?" It was too much, too fast, reality and fantasy colliding, a heady drug in my veins. Limbs moved through thick liquid, my mind was leaden and blank as I gripped the edge of the table. _'Keep me on the ground'_ I prayed, _'let my fingers keep me here on Earth, because I don't want to go where she's leading.'_

"You are a miko, Kagome. You have been chosen to lay my sister's spirit to rest, and to protect the jewel that rests in your heart..."

A moment, a heartbeat, a slow swoop of eyelashes.

"By slaying Inuyasha."

* * *


	4. Promises, promises

**Penumbra ****

* * *

**Grandpa and Mama had wanted to know why I had a strange child in the house, but Maro merely smiled and quickly fabricated a story. Kagome the heroine, rescuing lost children in the train station. 

Yeah, heroine.

How did one go about killing a supernatural being anyway?

I left my window open that night. It was too cool really, the late summer air already chilling with the slow death of autumn, but there was no mansion or castle that was big enough to contain my mood tonight. Fingers dipped in pale moonlight rested on the chipped paint windowsill, and for an instant I wanted to leap out into the night and run away like the fairytale children I had loved so much.

The knowledge Maro imparted on me was suffocating in the silence and the darkness. I welcomed the heavy drooping of my eyelids, the sweet escape of sleep lulling me into a dreamless black. Lazily, one last thought whispered across my brain.

_'Where was Peter Pan when you needed him?'_

It wasn't Peter Pan who visited my window that night.

Jerking awake, it took a few seconds to blink away the sleep. A quick sweep of my room didn't show anything misplaced, but there was a weight to the atmosphere that made me look twice.

The glint of quicksilver caught my eye, and before I knew it, Inuyasha was kneeling next to me. It was strange how his presence didn't surprise me.

"What are you doing here?" I tried to get up, but his glare froze me in place. I was still wary that he'd take that clawed hand and plunge it through flesh and bone to grasp what he saw as his.

"I didn't know where else to go." His tone was angry, as if _I_ had been the one who made him leave. Well...I hadn't been expecting that one.

And yeah, I'll admit it- in my naïveté and sleep-hyped immortality I let that piss me off. "You better leave."

One strong brow arched in disbelief at my open contempt. "You think you're in any position to tell me what to do?" I noticed for the first time the fuzzy ears twitching madly on top of all that glowing hair. Somehow, those ears made a big difference in his appearance. He was no longer an ancient specter, all wild beauty and hazy night god, but rather a petulant teenager. Dog demon of old made me edgy. But grumpy bully who was looking younger and more human by the minute? That, I could relate to.

The insane urge to smile was crushed as Maro's words echoed through my mind.

_'...by slaying Inuyasha.' _

"I was told I was meant to kill you." His ears went still, and whatever respite I felt from the grim truth disappeared.

_'Why would you warn your victim?'_ Some other place in my mind snorted, clearly unimpressed with the way I was handling the situation.

_'He could hardly be called a victim.'_ I retorted, sulkily.

To his credit, he didn't laugh. He definitely didn't run away screaming either. "You're an arrogant bitch now, aren't you?" He must've seen me bristle at the words because he suddenly went offensive, backing me across the window seat. "Why don't I just snap your pretty neck right now before she teaches you how to take me down? After all, you _do_ have something I want."

The expression on his face reminded me of his other selves. I blotted out the memory of the last time he had been that close, the name of another earning the curses on his lips. My back hit the wall as he leered at me, his aura radiating aggression.

I was sick of retreating, of being told what to do by people who had no right to dictate my actions. For the past three months, I had been running, hoping I could cheat my life from the debts it was demanding of me. And no, it wasn't fair, but it wasn't going to change. All I could do was deal with it. All I could do was act upon it. I was going to butt heads with fate, even if the price was my life.

I was surprised to realize I was angry. I hadn't been angry, truly angry, for so long now.

My hands opened the collar of my night shirt, exposing the expanse of my neck and collar bone to his surprised gaze.

"If you want it, take it. I'll let you."

I hope I shook that bastard. I hope he was disturbed down to his dirty bare feet. Because right now, lashing out was the best idea I've ever had, and it felt good. I really was crazy, I thought as I tamped down the urge to giggle nervously. What kind of demented psycho would offer herself like a lamb to the slaughter?

Deep down inside was the fear that maybe I was looking for an easy way out.

He looked shocked at first, then anxiously determined. He drew his hand back, poised it for the killing blow. I shut my eyes, hindsight telling me I should've chosen a better place to die. Mama didn't need to walk in tomorrow to find another loved one gone; insides ripped open in cold blooded gore. Had I really just been thinking about my friends seeing me as a horror film casualty?

Ironic.

I counted off the ticking seconds. Five, six, seven...His harsh breathing was the only thing I could register. Blood was rushing through me, pounding in my ears, and still those panting inhalations drowned it out.

Would I see Dad again?

I'm sorry Mama, so sorry...

Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen...

"FUCK!"

I didn't have to ask him to leave this time. When I opened my eyes, the curtains were swishing his goodbye.

* * *

"Kagome!" 

I blinked up at the sound of my name.

"Oh my god...are you ill!" Eri looked horrified, not the first person to notice the toll a day of shocks had had on my body.

"I'm fine, truly!" I smiled sheepishly, waving my arms around as if to brush the words aside.

"Seriously, Higurashi, you're not looking too well." Hojo crouched by my desk, his concern clearly displayed in his warm eyes.

I crossed my arms, aiming for nonchalance. "I'm okay guys, I swear. I just had a rough night last night, that's all."

Eri's concern melted into a relieved grin. "Oh, I get it. You're worried about that math exam, right?"

I had forgotten completely about that math exam.

"Something like that." I replied weakly.

Hojo brightened, straightening. "In that case Higurashi, allow me to tutor you! Math is my best subject!"

Well, couldn't say the boy lacked enthusiasm even if he was a bit off. "Er...thank you Hojo. That won't be necessary though."

His face fell and I was immediately assailed with guilt.

"That is to say, not today! Now that you guys mention it, I actually am feeling a bit sick. I think I might go home and rest."

I was recipient of several sympathetic nods and a handful of offers to call and help should I need it. A swing by the nurses' office revealed a low grade fever from stress rather than illness, but it was enough to get me excused from class.

Though they meant well, the last thing I could deal with today were the prying questions of my fellow students.

The thought of returning to an empty shrine made my throat close up. The sun was still high, but the streets of Tokyo were subdued, all its citizens working or schooling. The school ground passed by me unnoticed, followed by the ramen stall, the movie rental shop. Shops blurred and became sparse, while the trees grew denser.

Maybe Grandpa would skip the historical society fundraiser.

Maybe Mama would have a day off.

Souta could have the same bug as me- maybe he went home early too.

The shrine steps came into view. Leaves whispered in the breeze. It wasn't anything unusual, but my skin began prickling...

_I waaaaaaant iiiiiiiiiiiit..._

"Look out!"

A razor sharp insect leg whizzed by my face before I could even react, a hairline cut oozing a thin line of red. Moments later I was bodily grabbed, seconds before the inhuman body scored another blow, but not without a parting one. An animal shriek ripped at my ears behind me, drawing my gaze upwards. Hovering over me, face twisted in a snarl-

"Inuyasha?"

Crimson leaked through the material of a modern t-shirt where he had been hit. The price tag peeked out of the collar and it might've been funny, except his blood was dripping all over me. My nose, cheeks, the corner of my eye; it cooled instantly on my skin, slid down into my hair.

I knew then I really didn't want to kill him.

"What are you, _stupid_! I said look out!" He shouted right in my face, but I was still floored, eyes riveted to the stained material on his shoulder.

"You're bleeding..." I almost reached out to touch it, but my hand seemed frozen to my side.

"Oh for fucks' sake." He rolled his eyes before he drew his palm back and smacked me.

The crack of his palm brought sanity back, and I blinked, momentarily stunned by the force of the blow. My eyebrows drew together in annoyance. "Did you just _hit_ me!"

"It's about time you stopped looking like a spaced out zombie." Inuyasha snorted.

"The Jewel of the Four Souls. I want it." A distinctly female voice commanded from above us.

I looked past Inu Yasha to see a monstrous parody of humanity. Her upper torso was multi-limbed, the face of a woman contorted in fury. But her body was a twisting, clicking mess of legs and insect exoskeleton.

"I was so lonely here at this shrine." She lamented, "And then _you_ came."

Inuyasha curled two clawed fingers, cracking his wrist in an intimidating display of prowess. "Listen old lady, you're a few hundred years too late. The Shikon no Tama is _mine_."

"You half-human _brat_." She spat, appendages twitching in agitation. "Let's see what you can do with your dirty blood."

Inuyasha's pupils dilated and I could hear a crunch as he clenched his teeth. I thought he would curse, but instead, his lips curled back, and his eyes narrowed. The laughter bubbled out of his throat in sick guffaws until his mouth was wide and gaping with it, fangs bared and flashing.

"You've got a big mouth for such a weak demon." His smirk was evil, menacing. All traces of the boy who had been before me last night were wiped off his face cleaner than a dry erase board. "That's okay though. It just makes it easier."

He was off the ground then, so fast that I hadn't detected the actual movement. He extended one hand, claws flashing before he plunged them right in the centipede woman's mouth. He spun, following the line of her body, ripping her right in two. I shielded my head as bits of centipede demon rained over me. She hadn't screamed once- he had ripped out her windpipe first.

I should've been shocked, horrified by the display of carnage. Inuyasha landed behind me in a crouch, flicking the guts off his fingers as his stood. The pieces of the centipede's body dissolved into ash, scattering in the wind.

He wasn't human. There was no way he could be, even if it was only half.

I was scared.

All of this- the jewel, my spiritual powers, and at times, Inuyasha himself- it frightened me.

I could admit that now.

He turned, stalking towards me, and my hands instinctively clutched my shirt front. Would he do the same to me as he did to the centipede demon? Would he mercilessly rip the jewel from my heart while I gaped down at the hole in my chest? I shuddered when his eyes met mine.

I flinched as he grabbed my collar when he reached me.

But, even if it scared me...

Resolutely, I met his gaze, willing myself not to look away.

…it didn't mean that I would give into that fear.

"When I say look out, bitch, I don't mean STAND THERE!"

I blinked in confusion. "What?"

"I didn't warn you so you could just stand there with your mouth hanging open! Geez, is everyone in this time as useless as you?" He ranted, mere inches from my face. His point of focus moved down, suddenly zeroed-in on my cheekbone. He released my shirt more gently than he grabbed it. "Damn, look at you, you still managed to get hurt."

He brought a clawed hand up to the gash on my face. Before he could touch my skin, a sizzle of pink light reached out, zapping his fingers.

He yelped, sticking the abused digits in his mouth. His ears twitched madly as he shot me a dirty look. Taking his fingers out of his mouth, he stepped back. "I see you still don't trust me."

I noticed for the second time his abused appearance- the stolen clothes, the dirt smudges and pavement scrapings- and his wounds still oozing blood.

It didn't sit right with me, his beat-up appearance.

"Don't trust you? I would be crazy to. Just last night you tried to kill me." I retorted, shooting him a dubious look.

He growled. "Listen, psycho, that was all _your_ idea! And besides, I didn't go through with it, did I?"

I felt calmer than I should've been as I drew nearer. He gave me a suspicious once over.

"Why _didn't_ you do it?" I asked, my eyes unwavering from his angry face. "And furthermore, why did you protect me today? I am the reincarnation of the woman who sealed you. I have the jewel, and I have been sworn to kill you. But last night, you didn't take the golden opportunity I presented you with. And today..." My fingers touched the sticky fabric of his shirt. "You chose to protect me even at the cost of your own well-being."

He wouldn't look at me, face guarded, pissed off. I had definitely struck a nerve.

I was about to strike another, too.

"I'm not Kikyo." I whispered, instinctively knowing that was the reason behind it all. How could he feel any attachment to a complete stranger? But to one who had the same face as his tragic lover...

"Who the hell said you were? Kikyo was a hundred, no, a thousand times more beautiful! She never would have worn such indecent clothing, nor would she hesitate like _you_ did back there! And she definitely would've thanked me for saving her sorry ass! You're just a pale imitation." Inuyasha sneered, but his fists were clenched so tight his claws were drawing blood.

"This is a warning. Even if you refuse to harm me...In order to put Kikyo's soul to rest-" There was a catch in my voice and I knew I was close to tears. Why me? Why now? As if my plate wasn't full of enough emotional challenges. "I will kill you, Inuyasha."

"You can try." He flashed me the same grin he did at the centipede demon. "But I'm warning you- I won't just lie down in some ditch and die."

I allowed the same smile to tug at my lips, forcing back my upset. "And neither will I."

"I'll be waiting, whenever you want a fight-" He glanced back. "..._miko_."

With that, he left, bounding away to wherever it was he took shelter when not playing with my life.

Miko?

Was that what I was now? I didn't feel like a miko. I didn't even feel like killing Inu Yasha was the right course of action. The thought of doing to him what he did to the demoness sickened me. He may be an arrogant, dangerous and moody jerk, but he was still a person.

I didn't want to do it.

"Stay the hell away from me, Inuyasha! Never come back here!" I screamed to his retreating back, but it was doubtful that he paid my words any heed.

He probably didn't even see them for what they really were- a plea.

* * *

AN : For those of you worried this is going to be some sort of lame re-hashing of the series events- don't worry, it's not :D I liked the centipede mistress, so I brought her back, but I do not intend to have Kagome and Inuyasha face every single foe they did in the series. Alright, back to your regularly scheduled fanfic!   



	5. The plot thickens

**Penumbra **

* * *

_ Thwing.._

_Thwack!_

"You're saying he protected you?" Maro's eyebrows drew down over her big eyes, an expression of deep thinking rather than displeasure.

"Yes." I fit the arrow to my fingers and drew back the bowstring. My arm protested, already sore from the half-hour of practice. The arrow whistled before it hit the tree, inches away from the outermost ring of the bulls-eye.

_Thwing…_

_Thwack!_

"That's highly unusual." The child muttered, no longer paying attention to my marksmanship. I made a face at the tree I had been mutilating.

"Can I stop now? My arm hurts." I frowned as I flexed the appendage mentioned.

She nodded her consent, and I gladly dropped my bow to gather the shafts stuck in the trunk. I had to tug hard to get some free- something my raw fingers didn't appreciate much.

"Isn't there another way to utilize my spiritual powers?" I asked, throwing the last of the arrows into a pile. That done, I stretched out on the ground, happy for the break from the unwanted task.

"There are other weapons you could learn to use, yes. However, arrows are the best decision for a novice like you. Superiority in using them does not require large amounts of strength, or years of practiced technique- rather, some good judgment and a keen eye. It is also a weapon that is difficult to use against you, should attackers come in close range, and gives you an advantage over those attacking-"

"Okay! Okay!" I interjected, a little exasperated that she made so much sense. "Geez, try breathing while you speak once in a while. I was only whining anyway." I smiled a little to soften the blow.

Maro remained unblinking and un-amused. "I breathe when I speak."

My answer was a light shrug- humor was lost on Maro, apparently. She was the only grade school kid in the world that didn't appreciate Bugs Bunny cartoons. "Utterly childish." I had heard her mutter under her breath when she watched one with Souta. The phrase disturbed me, with good reason- it was coming out of the mouth of an eight-year-old.

I found myself voicing inner queries. "Have you always been this way Maro? Even in your past life?"

She seemed to consider this for a moment before answering. Her pigtails swished lightly against the strap of her tiny purse as a breeze flew by. "I'm not sure. I have my memories from this life, but I also have a lifetime's worth of knowledge from my former self. Perhaps, the me that exists now is a compromise between the two." She imitated my shrug. "Quite frankly, I'm far more concerned about Inu Yasha playing hero than I am about my levels of consciousness."

"He loved Kikyo, you know." My gaze got lost in the play of leaves and sunlight. It reminded me of some childhood moment, unspecific but so strong I could smell the rain that had been threatening in the air. The silence from the girl next to me was too long. I glanced over and blinked when I saw how tense she had become in the space of those few long minutes.

"How dare you." She wouldn't look at me, but self-righteous fury oozed off of every syllable. My heart jerked and sped up, a nervous sweat breaking out on my palms. She turned towards me then, and I knew I should have kept my musings to myself. "He used my sister and then tossed her aside like she was just another piece of trash, all for his own selfish ambitions. I saw their last fight- there wasn't an ounce of remorse in him." This wasn't Maro, something told me instinctively.

"_I_ surface in this child, _I_ come to you out of my own good will to try and aide you in your destiny, and you have the nerve _sympathize _with your enemy?" She was back, the woman from the first night with Maro, old and bitter and tired. What had I called her? I knew her, I swear I did-

"They were tricked...Kaede." My headache was back, but I ignored it in favor of trying to reason with Maro's other awareness. "Listen- Inuyasha wasn't whole when Kikyo sealed him. The side you saw wasn't-"

"It was enough!" The small girl bellowed with all the authority of an elder. "Anyone with that much horror in them...deserves whatever justice is brought against them." She hissed the last part of the sentence, before her small frame hunched slightly in on herself. She appeared to be in pain, if her harsh breathing was any indication.

At a loss, I merely watched her. Several more minutes elapsed before she abruptly stood. "We're done for the day." Her voice held the hollow and even quality I had become accustomed too. Without another word, she clutched her Hello Kitty bag and walked away, leaving me to contemplate the outburst.

I gathered my arrows slowly, before slinging my bow across my back. The weight was beginning to feel familiar, after two straight weeks of training. Still, the routine of cleaning up my practice area couldn't shake the confrontation I had just had out of my mind.

Apparently, Inuyasha wasn't the only one harboring a grudge over the past.

* * *

"Souta! Mama! Grandpa! I'm home!" I called out, hearing the T.V. speaking softly in the other room. 

"Mama's at the store!" I heard Souta shout in reply. Brothers and communication. Go figure. "Ramen for dinner tonight!"

I stuck out my tongue, but resigned myself to the less than satisfactory meal. As I poured the heated water that had been left for me over the noodles, I caught a flash of quicksilver through the window.

Two weeks without so much as a peep out of him, and he just waltz's back into my shrine like he never left it? I was tempted to ignore his presence, but something in me just couldn't allow it. Casting the softening noodles a contemplative look, I grabbed a pair of chopsticks and the hot Styrofoam cup.

"I'll be right back Souta." I said, and did not wait for a reply as I slipped out the front door.

All was still in the main area of the shrine, but I had an idea of where he would be. Walking across the courtyard, I stood in front of the huge stone gate. Somehow, I knew it would open for me.

I was not disappointed as it swung ajar, and I walked through without hesitation this time. Initially the stillness of the enclosure made me think I had been mistaken about his location, but an unnatural rustling in the leaves of the Goshinboku tree signaled otherwise.

As calmly as possible, I walked over without haste and settled myself on one of the larger roots. I removed the half-open top of the ramen cup, letting the fragrant steam waft out into the night. Crumpling the soggy circle of paper in my hand, I waited for Inuyasha to give himself away.

The trees above me sniffed curiously. I forced back my grin. "I know you're there. Come down. I'll be good, I promise."

The leaves scoffed before a red blur leapt down to join me on the ground. "What, no death threats today?" He sized me up as he settled one hand at his waist. The modern clothing had been discarded in favor of the old robes, I noted. I shifted in my seat to face him, but he took it as a sign of aggression. Leaping back a few paces, he put his hands palm-up in a poor attempt at a defensive position as his face puckered into some sort of estimation of a battle face. I swallowed my giggles as he growled. "I'm ready, wench! Don't think I won't kick your ass just because you're a girl."

Ignoring his tense posture, I blew lightly on the hot soup. His eyes fell to my dinner and stayed fixed there.

I managed a half-smile for him. "Truce for now. I'm tired, and apparently you're hungry."

The insinuation seemed to wound his pride, because he turned his nose up and let out a noise that sounded distinctly like '_keh_'. "Listen, I'm half dog demon. I don't need-"

Raising an eyebrow, I lifted noodle-laden chopsticks to my mouth and took a bite. He was so intent on staring longingly at my meal that he forgot to finish his sentence. I couldn't suppress my mischievous expression. "You were saying you didn't need something?" I feigned an innocent expression. Common sense told me it was preposterous that I could tease this legendary, and by all means mythological, creature as if he was my little brother, but my instincts were at rest for the first time since this whole ordeal started. Something was telling me this was natural, this was how things were supposed to be.

A light flush rose on his cheeks, and he began to stammer out some sort of excuse. He was silenced when I thrust the ramen and chopsticks under his nose.

"I'm not hungry. You finish it."

I thought I saw gratitude flash in his eyes but he snatched the food from my hands and started slurping it down so fast that I couldn't be sure. Oddly, I didn't feel pity as I watched the very obviously starving boy scarf the sub-par dinner down. Rather, I felt a sense of satisfaction- of peace.

"Wow!" He exclaimed, for the moment seemingly unconcerned with my presence. "This is delicious!" All further speech attempts on his part were impaired by his determination to eat as quickly as possible, but the message was clear- he liked it. Feeling at ease by his acceptance, I broached the topic I had been intending to speak to him about since my afternoon with Maro.

"Inuyasha, I need you to do something for me."

Inuyasha's ears twitched as he froze mid-gulp, a suspicious expression pinching his eyebrows together. "Heh na."

Years of watching Souta trying to speak and chew at the same time allowed me the ability to translate Inuyasha's mumbled reply- 'Hell no.'

"Please. It's very important." I clasped my hands together in an attempt to keep them from twitching in annoyance. He hadn't even heard me out!

He didn't bother to reply this time, just kept eating as if I hadn't said anything at all. I huffed a little before deciding to keep explaining myself.

"It regards the task I was charged with." He showed no reaction to these words either. Seeing as how mention of my plans to kill him did nothing to dent his appetite, I assumed that my next request couldn't do much harm. "I want you to tell me everything that happened with Kikyo."

He froze again, this time swallowing what he had been chewing loud enough for it to be audible. He spoke finally. "I can't remember."

The muscles of my body bunched. "Inuyasha, please don't clam up about this. I know I don't trust you, and I'm sure you don't trust me, but this is_really _important, so I need you to-"

"I said, I don't remember!" He snapped, baring his fangs. I was abruptly reminded that this was a being capable of ripping open a centipede monster- a being who currently had designs on an object I carried within my body. My hands curled into firsts. He continued, oblivious to the slight shift in my mood. "Everything after I used the jewel is a blur. I don't know how I was sealed, or how I woke up. One second I was making my wish, the next I was disoriented and staring at you."

He seemed to settle his emotions as he drew his last sentence to a close. The threatening aura I had felt so keenly calmed, and with it, my anxiety. I decided I would try to push him a little harder. "Surely you must remember_something_. Anything."

I saw his spine straighten and he shot me a distrusting look, as if I had said something that had struck too close to whatever mental processes he was sorting through. I saw him weigh the benefits and drawbacks of speaking up, then finally- he opened his mouth.

"There are things that come to me. Seconds of experiences I can't account for." His bright eyes glazed over, and I knew he was consciously trying to draw upon those memories. "I know this strange food you've given me is called 'ramen'. I understand that your clothing comes from a shop, and that the people of your time only pay in currency, instead of livestock, produce or other valuables. I don't understand how I know these things. But I do." He sighed, tugging on a lock of hair in mild frustration.

I mulled over what his confession could mean. In terms of information, it meant that Inuyasha somehow still had a link to his human consciousness, who would have had to learn how to survive as the times changed. In terms of himself, it meant he had decided to take a leap of faith where I was concerned, and openly answer my questions.

If there was one thing I could instinctively feel, it was the way things just didn't seem to add up. The more I became embroiled in this medieval drama, the more obvious the discrepancies between the accounts became. Had Inuyasha been the monster Maro believed, he would not have hesitated in taking the jewel and fulfilling his ambitions, this time without the hindrance of Kikyo's arrow. If I was going to make sense of this mess, I had to get both Inuyasha and Kikyo's accounts of what happened. I bit my lip, unsure if the latter was even a possibility. Still, I could try- starting with the grumpy half-demon.

"Inuyasha...why did you wound Kikyo that day?" I was cautious asking this, unsure if this would again set off his temper.

He didn't disappoint. "Not that it's any of your business, but I think you've got it backwards. It was that crazy wench who shot at _me_! Didn't even spare a second to explain herself. I was played for a fool!" He snarled the last part, ears twitching wildly in irritation, strong brows drawn low over his eyes.

I wanted to back off, but the record had to be set straight. "She wanted to be with you, Inuyasha. I know she did."

He snorted in contempt. "Right. Because nothing says 'I love you' like turning your intended into a moving target. As if you would know the first thing about her, and what she felt, anyway."

He turned away from me, but part of me was screaming 'he has to know'. Mama always did say I was too stubborn for my own good. "I may not have been there...but you saw her apparition the same as I that night." I looked to him for some sort of confirmation.

He ceased all movement at this, the only clear indication that he was listening was one fuzzy ear cocking in my direction to catch every last word.

"I see her almost every night. And every time I do- she is mourning for you."

Tense seconds passed in which neither of us spoke. He seemed to be struggling with the information I had just imparted on him.

My heart and arms went out to him. "Inuyasha..."

He whirled to face me, expression enraged. "Stay the fuck away! You know shit about me!"

And with that, he was gone so fast that all that was visible to my ordinary, human eyes was a flash of angry, vulnerable red.

"You took my line, you stupid jerk." I whispered, not caring that I was the only one there to hear it.

A humorless smile crossed my lips when I realized he had taken the ramen with him.

* * *

AN: Woooow, it's been a while. Don't hate me. Penumbra lives on in my heart! Thanks for all the readers who have stuck with this story. 3 I'm grateful in so many ways for your loyalty. 


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